The blame game is a HUGE part of dealing with infertility. There are so many pieces of the fertility puzzle it is easy to place blame or run 102,292,283 hypothetical situations through your head. I do believe stress can play a role in creating less than optimal results for fertility treatment, but it is not the end all be all. Let's take into consideration all the aspects that go into a successful FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer) for example;
- Appropriate Estrogen priming
- An endometrium measuring around 8mm-13mm (some say 7mm)
- A multilayered appearance of the lining
- No spotting/bleeding
- A successful transfer day
- A healthy embryo
- Implantation of said healthy embryo in the uterus
Fertility treatments are a challenge for control freaks. Sure you can take the ample amounts of Estrogen that your doctor prescribes, but you CANNOT control how your body metabolizes it. You CANNOT control spotting and bleeding. You CANNOT control if your embryo decides to stick in your uterus either.
Something you CAN control are the crazy thoughts in your head, and the insistent need to blame yourself should something not go right. A book that I have found very helpful in controlling my wandering mind is called "The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself" by Michael Singer. This book is REAL good at reeling in the crazy. The fertility world is stressful enough.. the last thing you need is your own little negative voice beating you down along the way!