Funny Girls of Fertility

The Mess of Stress

Sharon

I may be a little off my normal infertility post, but I've had a lot of patients recently who stress level is out the wahzoo. Stress can make a mess of your life, you just have to take control of it!

The main cause of the stress I have been seeing recently is all due to comparison of fertility treatments.  I don't know how many times I can stress to my patients to stop comparing their cycles to everyone else.  I see a bajillion lady parts a day.  I can tell you, everyones uterus is different, everyones ovaries sit a little different, ladies have different AMH's, different medication protocols.  There's just no comparing!  I had a patient the other day say, "my friend went through stim and she got 11 eggs, how did I only get 5??!?!?"  I mean she was pissed, there was no explaining to her that antral follicle counts differ, not all eggs are going to be mature either!  I maybe could have kept explaining that to her, but she wasn't listening either way.  It was definitely a Listen Linda moment ((if you haven't watched that YouTube video you totally should.)) 

Everyone deals with stress differently.  My go to way of dealing with stress usually involves exercise; be it yoga/running/workout videos.  I know when going through stimulation you are supposed to be taking it easy, but try to at least go out for a light walk everyday.  

Disconnecting.  Sometimes you just need to step away from social media.  I mean how often are you annoyed by what you see people posting that you want to block them anyways?!   Social media is not real life.  You don't see them folding laundry or going to the grocery store, doing the mundane shit that makes you think "there has to be more to life then this."  You see the happy times, the adventures, the positives.  When you are struggling through infertility (or even just a rough life patch) seeing that stuff is going to knock you down some more.  Put your phone away, set a time that you are going to disconnect for, and stick to it.

Relax!  Do something for you.  Whatever it is you find relaxing, make it happen.  Take your mind off the infertility struggle for a minute. If you aren't going to your doctors appointments every other day, I know you are probably researching, blogging, reading blogs (hopefully mine :) ), and just overloading your brain with everything infertility.   Its consuming.  Infertility may be something you are dealing with it, but you can't lose yourself in the journey.  

Keep Busy!  Boy, did I just totally send a mixed message with that one. Relax and stay busy?  Trust me, I confuse myself on the reg.   I am by nature a busy bee.  Even through college my friends called me the Energizer Bunny because I would stay up partying until 3am, be in class by 7am, and I just didn't stop.  To this day the busier I am the happier I am (need to thank my Dad for that awesome quality, note sarcasm.)  Staying busy is going to help keep your mind off of what you are dealing with!   Volunteer, go shopping (maybe window shopping because I know all your money is probably drained into your fertility treatment), take up a new hobby, enjoy the outdoors, spend time with your friends.

This is just stuff I try to do when I'm feeling less than awesome.  Since Ive gotten older I just want to make the most out of every single day I'm given.  I wish someone would have told my 20 year old self to do the same.  Although infertility sucks some major balls (for lack of better terminology) embrace the crazy, and think what a bad ass story you can tell your kids when they get older.